serving_love | (no subject)

Current Mood: wtf?!

(no subject)

...

...

There's something wrong with the oven.

......And the cook top.

ETA: AND the microwave.

ETA: 2 ...And the cappuccino machine.

ETA: 3 ......And the BLENDER.

ETA: 4 AND EVERYTHING. Who the fucking hell messed with my goddamn kitchen??!?!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...I never leave the oven on.

I don't...I don't remember. Something with chicken, I think. And some sort of glaze... Might've had bananas in it. Or asparagus. Zeff used to make it! I think......maybe.

Well. You DID.

You don't remember how to make it anymore?? See! That's weird!!

Quick, how do you make, uhm...blueberry waffles?

...

...

You, uh. Make waffles. And. Add blueberries.

...Right. So BASICALLY, you don't know how to cook anymore.

...No.

No!

What-- NO!!!

Don't be stubborn, dumbass! I found a whole bunch of exploded eggs in the microwave! Even I know better than that!

Edited 2009-04-21 02:58 (UTC)

SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU NOT BEEN ABLE TO PUT EGGS IN THE MICROWAVE????

...Just do us all a favor and DON'T try to cook anymore today. PLEASE.

Um. I know how to make grilled cheese sandwiches. If that helps.

...

Don't try to cook? Are you serious?

JUST FOR NOW!!

Don't we at least have some leftovers we can warm u--

Never mind. That was a dumb question.

Oh yeah, leftovers, sure, Luffy, Zoro, Franky, and every other asshole on the crew just decided they WEREN'T HUNGRY yesterday, so we had tons to save after dinner.

...I SAID it was a dumb question, jeez.

...

Sorry.

...S'okay.

I really DO know how to make grilled cheese sandwiches, though. That's...better than nothing, right?

...Right. Grilled cheese, spaghetti, and whatever the hell France can make. Awesome.

What? That's not TOO bad!! Obviously none of us are gonna be world-class chefs; that's why we have YOU around.

Ur. Under normal circumstances, I mean.

...

What, so now I'm useless?!

...

No! That's not what I meant!

That's what it sounded like! I mean, what if...what if I don't ever remember how to cook? What're we going to do?? You guys won't need me anymore, that's the one thing I'm SUPPOSED to do on this stupid ship, so you'll have to find another cook and you'll probably just forget all about me. Luffy'll become Pirate King one day and you all will look back and think, hmm, I wonder whatever happened to that one stupid blond guy with the fucking lame curly eyebrow, and I'll be off wallowing in self-pity somewhere wondering if you guys ever found All Blue, but then I'll remember that it wouldn't matter because even if you had, I wouldn't be able to cook a goddamn thing there.