serving_love | (no subject)

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(no subject)

uavhflk

Z-Zoro. Trying to smother me in my sleep. And I didn't stay to CHECK or anything, but he might have been NAKED!!

How did I even get back up here?? If this is supposed to be a joke, it isn't funny you guys! And--

Wait.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON??!?!?

...I really need a cigarette.

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Yeah, I'm TRYING. I was gonna see if I could cut down, at least. And I did, a little! From yesterday.

...except Sanji thinks I might actually be smoking more than he does anyway.

That's a bit sad.

Hey, it's not like I KNOW how much he normally smokes! He's pretty much got a cigarette in his mouth ALL THE TIME. And his hands just kinda...automatically reach for a new one and light it before I even notice, half the time.

That's odd. I feel like someone ought to run tests on you two. There's a breakthrough in here somewhere.

Yeah. Because being a guinea pig is EXACTLY what I need on top of all this.

It wasn't a serious suggestion.

Well. GOOD.

I've more important things to be concerned with, anyway.

...oh my GOD. You're a horse now too??!?

I'm a unicorn, specifically.

Sure, fine, whatever.

......how are you even TYPING?

With extreme care. I don't think I would be able to do it if not for the cloven hooves.

So I hear you're stuck in the hold...

I can get out now, but I'm trying to remain here so that I don't inadvertently gore three or possibly four of my nakama.

...aren't unicorns supposed to be all gentle and wise and stuff??

I think I'm an evil unicorn. I want to trample virgins.

...wait a minute.

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU AND SANJI DOING??? LEAVE MY BODY OUT OF YOUR EXPERIMENTS!!!

I wouldn't actually hurt it. It's in the name of science.

Sanji said something about almost being gored.

Oh, it wasn't that close.

How close WAS it?

He only came up to the door.