serving_love | [002 || Voice]

*jeez Sanji, Rome wasn't built in a day. especially with minimal help :|* Well, all the basic stuff is done, sure. *flaps a hand dismissively* But I mostly just covered the hole in there, you know, kinda put up a new wall? So they don't have a window anymore.

*tosses the tape measure on his bed, along with a piece of paper with the measurements written on it* Anyway. Apples? Ready whenever you are.

Do they need a window? It could be like sleeping on Merry again. [forces himself into an upright position, absently dragging one hand through his hair and reaching for his tie—which was hanging haphazardly off the end of the bed—with his other] Yeah, apples. I'm up, I'm up.

[reaches for his shoes next, but then pauses abruptly and looks up at Usopp] Oh, hey! I didn't tell you! I totally have a date later today with this girl I don't even know! [and actually, it's really only a date in his mind -- Aerith is just being kind enough to show him her vegetable garden, BUT PSHAW, DETAILS]

*shrugs* Maybe not. I kind of like having one though, so I figured...

*grabs his awesome manpurse but pauses before he can loop the strap over his head, looking at Sanji with an odd expression. obviously he heard that wrong* Wait, you what?

You're not living in there, though. [IS SO CONSIDERATE]

[stupid grin] I have a date! [hops off the bed and goes over to his closet, browsing through what minimal new clothing he's managed to get here] ...And none of these shitty clothes are gonna cut it—fuck, I miss my wardrobe. [pulls out a random shirt and frowns down at it]

*slowly finishes putting on his bag, raising one eyebrow*

A date? With an actual girl?

*a long pause*

...does she know?

Of course she— [happens to look up right then and sees the completely incredulous look on Usopp's face and finally catches on] ...Oi. The hell is that look, you think a lady wouldn't go out with me??

*TURNS AWAY QUICKLY* What look? There's no look! It's just kinda...

*a long pause as he fishes around for an appropriately innocuous word that still gets the basic idea across*

...unexpected.

[GIANT FROWN]

How is it unexpected?! I make it a priority to ensure that girls are happy, if anything I should be taking them ALL out!

Well, you know. You just come on kinda strong. And I've never seen you actually get a date before, no matter how hard you tried, so--

*...is there anything he can hide behind?*

[splutters] What—you haven't? I get dates all the time! [total lie :|] I mean. Well, maybe it's been a little slow lately. [shifty eyes] It's hard to get dates when you're only at islands for short amounts of time, and being a pirate doesn't usually bring the best reputation with it.

[...]

I dated more before you knew me.

[ish -- that one thing with the girl who wanted a tour of the Baratie totally counted, okay]

*relaxing slightly; maybe he's not in danger* Oh. Y-yeah, I guess that makes sense. You'd think some girls would think the pirate part was exciting though, right? All...dangerous.

*nods quickly anyway, before Sanji can change his mind and decide to kick him*

Right, on your restaurant boat. That was probably like shooting fish in a barrel, huh?

*pauses* I dated more too. Before you knew me.

Well. Obviously. Of course there are girls who prefer that type.

[Sanji’s just never had any luck picking them up either. >.> But he doesn’t bother elaborating on any of that, and instead zeros in on Usopp’s claim.]

...Yeah? Probably not as much as me, though. You’re too young.

[That’s right, Usopp, Sanji has a whole TWO YEARS OF DATING EXPERIENCE more than you, what now. :|]

*never mind that he's totally lying, now he feels slightly offended at the implication that his pretend dating experience is somehow inferior to Sanji's pretend dating experience* I'm not that much younger than you!

*pauses* ...besides, I didn't have a curfew or anything. And I lived alone. *pauses again, a slow, smug smile coming onto his face* It was kind of a…bachelor’s paradise. *paaause* …if you know what I mean.

Two whole years! I was already wooing the ladies when you were still in diapers!

[stops short at that last bit -- like hell you were actual scoring dates in your supposed bachelor pad, you shitty liar, but it's still totally not fair that you at least had the option whereas Sanji very much did not live alone >\]

Che, I didn't have a shitty curfew either... And how many people even lived on your island anyway?! [suddenly sporting his own smug look] I had an entirely new garden of flowers to pick from every single day.

*raises an eyebrow* What, when you were four? *scoffs*

*recovers quickly, though, the smug look returning as he starts to really pick up stream*

...well, you didn't see my island. Sure, it was small, but it was also kind of a...travel hub. Practically a resort! Lots of new faces, all the time! Okay, maybe not quite as busy as your restaurant, but I had a whole island, not just a boat. There was a lot more variety for things to do on dates!

...I was an extremely cute four-year-old.

[makes a dismissive sound] Please, who needs a whole island. It's not like I was stuck with just the Baratie, you know, I did have a smaller ship of my own. Which, might I add, had a fully stocked and usable kitchen. [props a hand on his waist, juts a hip out, and flips his hair back before waggling his eyebrows at Usopp] Nothing more romantic than a private date on the ocean, eating a mouthwatering homemade dinner, having chocolate-dipped strawberries for dessert, and enjoying watching the sunset together with nothing but the gentle sounds of the waves serving as your background music~

…well I was an even cuter two-year-old! *he’s pretty confident about that*

*pauses for a moment, a little fazed, before he decides Sanji is completely full of it* *smiles knowingly, shaking his head a bit indulgently at Sanji’s claim. clearly his own story is MUCH more believable* Sure, that’s fine sometimes, but it’s better to have a lot of options, so you can make every date special for the girl you’re with. Everyone’s got different tastes, you know. A romantic boat ride, the amusement park, the theatre, dancing, a fancy dinner, extreme rock climbing…it depended on the girl! *tsks softly and wags an index finger in Sanji’s direction* If you really care about making girls happy, you should know that!

[just raises an eyebrow at Usopp, sounding skeptical] There was a shitty amusement park on your island? Really? [rolls his eyes now and loops his tie around his neck, starting to knot it] Of course I know every girl has different tastes. Chef, remember? But that's all a little flashy, don't you think? A more intimate first date is much better, there's not as many distractions and you really get to know the person you're with. Form a connection with them and all that, without any unnecessary gimmicks stealing away your attention. It's very intense.

[finishes with the tie and looks back at Usopp, lifting his chin a bit and letting a smug smirk tug at his mouth] And trust me, the ladies like intense. They never failed to show their gratitude, if you know what I mean~

[...kinda feels like he should be taking notes from all of this BS for when he DOES have a whole slew of women lining up outside the door to go on a first date with him—which he expects could happen as soon as tomorrow, you never know—and extreme rock climbing, that's actually not a bad idea, Usopp, COULD BE FUN :Db]

*nods emphatically* Sure there was! ...is. It has a big ferris wheel and everything. I once saved hundreds of people from certain doom when a carousel went out of control. Anyway-- *flaps his hand* That's not important. Obviously I'd get to know them! I had connections coming out the ears!!

*pauses for a moment and almost falters, wondering how much more actual experience Sanji has with girls--not that Usopp doubts his lady-killing abilities, oh no, but he never really got a chance to really test them, since he never knew all that many girls in the first place* ...of course I know what you mean. I've gotten tons of gratitude myself, you know!

Huh. [casual] I'll have to ask Luffy and Zoro about it, then. I bet they thought it was pretty awesome.

[SO MUCH EXPERIENCE, OH MAN—in his ~fantasies~ anyway :|] I'm starting to feel bad for that lady friend of yours. Kaya-san, was it? I wonder if she knows how much competition she had.

*nice try Sanji, but he's unconcerned* Oh, yeah, I'm sure they did. They didn't have time to go on any rides or anything, though.

[...well played, sir. not that that makes Sanji believe you, but he’ll let it slide this time with a roll of his eyes and a ‘whatever’ type of shrug]

*it takes a moment for him to really hear that last part, and when he does...* Competition? Wh--wait. Kaya? *way to throw him for a loop, Sanji. by the time he realizes it might have been better to just go along with that, it's too late. besides, making up lies about her being his girlfriend is just going too far* No, Kaya's not--y-you've got the wrong idea!!

[tries to look innocent] Do I? As much as you used to talk about her, I just assumed...

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