serving_love | (no subject)

Current Mood: irritated

(no subject)

Ship's damaged, ain't much of a market here, still shitty dragons everywhere. We've been told they ain't all that dangerous, though. Ha, yeah, tell that to Franky, damn things nearly took down the whole mast and our sails look like shit. But there's a lot of ships in the harbor, so at least we know they've got the means to fix this.

Apparently this island is called Berk. Shitty name. The people here—

...

Are they riding the—? What the hell. ...Back in a bit, gonna go take a closer look.

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Why the fuck would I be mad at them? ...Anymore. It's been months, so.

It's always about Zoro. Apparently the fact that he would rather I not talk to Lucci about stuff that, honestly, is probably better off staying private, and that, according to Lucci, he doesn't even want to hear about anyway, makes Zoro a controlling prick and makes Lucci unable to have any sort of real conversation with me at all in case shit like that comes up. So we were arguing about that and then somehow it ended up with Lucci saying how he was thinking about leaving or something, I don't even fucking know. It was messed up.

And George—I don't know. What did she say? I mean, I guess lately we haven't talked much about...you three, and all that, but I kinda figured it's because there just...wasn't much to say about it. Aside from the one thing. I assumed everything was fine there. Maybe that's my fault, I should've noticed if she was...upset with me? I don't—did I do something?? Fuck. This is really... Or is that about Zoro, too?

...I dunno. He wanted to.

No, no, I didn't THINK you were or anything, but...I don't know. Just checking, I guess...

Well, that's just dumb. And--wait, what? Thinking about LEAVING?? That's--he couldn't be serious. That wouldn't--what about...everything? He never said anything to me!! He was...probably just kidding or something, right? ...well, not KIDDING, but doing that thing he does where he says stuff without thinking and then takes it back when he's thinking more clear?

Um. She said she felt bad because she sort of...dragged you into the middle of. You know, our whole thing before. And that she didn't want to do that again, or...something like that, so. I don't know, she feels like she can't talk to you about stuff? But! You know. It's not like that's even really an issue anymore, right? ...it just doesn't make sense to me, Sanji.

...maybe I shouldn't have even said anything about it to you either.

Well. Fair enough, I guess.

...I really have no idea. He was saying how he's basically the root of all our problems or something. Or...that things have been going downhill ever since he and George got here and that they've never really been pirates anyway. I'm telling you, it was some real shitty stuff. I kept arguing against him because he's a moron, and eventually he said something about how Luffy would never let them leave anyway. So...who knows.

Ah. ...Well it's not like she was the only one, and I didn't really care. I said like five thousand times I'm glad people could talk to me about stuff. But. If that's how she feels, then I guess it doesn't—I mean, she's...got other friends. Maybe she just doesn't need me anymore. Like that.

About this?

Did you let George steer?

...that's STUPID. I mean. Okay, yeah, maybe he did some stupid stuff, but it's not like he's the only one who ever caused problems, or--

Wait. What do you mean, THEM?

...Er. Him. Luffy would never let HIM leave.

You said THEM.

What, did Lucci think he could just...leave and TAKE George with him or something?? I can't believe--

UGH.

No! No, I don't think—I don't know WHAT he was thinking, but he wouldn't...do that. And she wouldn't go anyway! He didn't mean it.

...yeah. Yeah, you're right. S-sorry, I kinda...I jumped to conclusions and-- Whatever. I was just being dumb.

I just--they BELONG here, Sanji. Both of them.

Don't have to tell me that.

But...he didn't mean it, right? He's...I THINK he's been acting normal lately. You know. Normal for him.

...I don’t know, Usopp. You could ask him, or tell him he needs to stay if you want, because evidently it wasn’t good enough coming from me. We haven’t—I don’t know how he may or may not be acting. Like I said, we haven’t really talked much in awhile.

...do you think he'd be mad you told me, though? I dunno. What if I ask him about it and it makes stuff worse?? But...maybe I should anyway. I don't know.

Mad at who, me? I don’t really care at this point.

It’s up to you.

I don't know. I guess. I just don’t want make things worse, you know?

...I’ll just see.

Yeah, yeah, I get it.

...are YOU mad now?

No.

So you mentioned something about smoking?

...well your icon looked kind of...irritated, I don't know. Forget it.

Oh! Yeah. Um. D-do you wanna?

Well. It was a bit.

...Nah, think I’ll pass this time.

...what'd I do??

No? Why not? Should we--do you wanna do something else instead?

It’s not you. Look, I said I wasn’t mad, I’m just—I dunno. Frustrated. I guess.

No reason. You can do it without me. When were you gonna, tonight? Because I have watch anyway and then right after I gotta start cooking shit for Luffy’s birthday tomorrow.

...okay. Should I ask WHY, exactly?

No, we didn't really think that far ahead or anything. Anyway...it's pointless if you aren't there. We can do it another time when you're not so busy.

...heh, so are you gonna make the turkey cake?

Because of—everything. Life. I'm frustrated by life.

How is it pointless? You don't need me there.

Yeah, I was planning on it.

...well, that doesn't sound good. Um. A-anything I can..?

Because the point was for us all to hang out again! We can't exactly all four hang out if you're NOT there. We'll just do it later; it's fine.

Awesome.

...No. Shit, sorry, that was fucking melodramatic. It's just—I already knew that Lucci doesn't feel like he can talk to me anymore. And it fucking sucks. But now you said George can't talk to me anymore either and...I really don't know what to do about that, but it also sucks. And I know Lucci did his shitty apology thing but that doesn't mean he and Zoro are ever really gonna get along, and it doesn't change the fact that Zoro doesn't want me telling him certain things, which are the things Lucci doesn't want to hear anyway, so you'd think it wouldn't even matter but apparently it does. Because the fact that there's that stupid restriction there pisses Lucci off and he's basically said it's not even worth it to try anymore, which...is lame. And sucks. But I can't even be mad at either of those two idiots because in the end half the reason they can't get along is my fault, so I just have to...deal with it. And now Lucci's going on about leaving or whatever the hell that is, and it hasn't come up since we had that thread, but it's still worrying.

And then on top of all THAT, I think Zoro's mad at me or something. Because I treated him like a girl when he was a girl.

And all of that shitty stuff just kind of hit me all at once so now I'm in a shitty mood. And I don't know what the point of hanging out together is if it's just gonna be awkward and weird.

...

And I'm out of flour. What the fuck.

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