serving_love | [001 || Video]

[The video flickers on, at first giving you nothing but a lovely view of some grass and the tip of a black shoe. The image is shaky as the picture swings from one side to the other, and a man's voice can be heard muttering.]

"The hell is this shitty thing...?"

[Eventually the screen gets flipped around with more dizzying momentum, showing a brief shot of the sky before lowering to take in a very confused face that is definitely looking worse for wear. He stares for a moment before sighing, and then drags his eyes away and instead gives his surroundings a scrutinizing look. As the camera pans back slightly, you're able to take in the torn and dirty clothes, the bruises and dried blood, and the general air of exhaustion the man has about him.]

"...Wonder where that bastard sent me." [He scrubs a hand over his face and through his hair, still muttering.] "Nami-san and Robin-chan better be alright, I swear—" [There's another sigh, slightly wistful this time, before the man looks curiously back to the screen again. Some faint beeping can be heard as he messes around with various buttons, and then the picture cuts out as he grumbles one last thing.]

"Fuck, I need a cigarette."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...When's lunch?

[INSTANT AUTOPILOT] [and also instant moving this fake-shitty-den-den-mushi-thing as far away from his ears as possible] Dammit, Luffy—it'll be ready when I say it's ready!

...

[Wait.]

[Luffy can't be here, not possible, Sanji definitely remembers hearing him yelling somewhere in the background when Kuma's shitty paw came swiping down.]

[...But—Sanji glances back at the screen and frowns—that's...definitely Luffy.]

[And then the rest of what Luffy said finally catches up to him.] Wait, what the hell do you mean, here again? What IS this shitty place??

—Hang on. [Now he sounds almost angry.] Why are YOU here?! [More specifically, why are you here SANS NAMI-SAN AND ROBIN-CHAN—but he'll get to that soon enough] What happened back with that other asshole???

[Wait, this exact conversation happened with Zoro a while back. Luffy connects the dots easily enough.]

...Huh? You don't remember Somareyland either?

...Somarey—what? [Scowls.] No, why the hell would I? We haven't been to a...something-shitty-land or whatever.

That's weird... Why am I the only one who didn't forget it?

You were here before! Twice!!

...

[stares at the screen, wondering just how hard someone with a rubber skull has to hit their head before totally going off the deep end]

I have not. I've never seen this place before in my life!

Have too! But that's okay, I can tell you everything you need to know.

It's a Mystery Dream Island!!

[staaares some more, then sighs and rubs his forehead]

Of course it is... Look, are Nami-san and Robin-chan here?? Or— [hesitates for a second, before forging on] Or Brook or...Usopp?

Nope. Just you, me and Zoro.

[slumps forward]

...Yep, definitely hell.

They'll probably show up one day like you just did!

[grooaans] One day, how is that reassuring at all?! You don't know the shitty state everyone was in when I left!! Except...you should. Since you were still there. [starting to look frustrated as he glowers down at Luffy's tiny image on his...den den mushi thing] ...Hey, what the hell is this thing, anyway?

[Careful, that's still a sore spot for Luffy. His grin suddenly fades away and he looks gloomy.]

...I know. I couldn't save anyone and I'm sorry. But time is weird here... When you go back to the Grand Line, it's like you were never gone at all. I'll fix everything when that happens!

[You might have to remind him about the strange den den mushi thing, because he already forgot you even asked about it.]

[ack, gloomy captain, that catches Sanji off-guard]

Ah...the hell're you talking about, Luffy, not like I did a damn thing either. It wasn't—hn. [takes a deep breath, releasing it slowly] You said time is weird here. That means we can still kick that shitty bear's ass when we go back? [still has no idea what "here" means really, but whatever]

[a sharp nod]

Right.

[nods right back]

Then that's all that matters.

Where are you now?

Hell if I know—some kind of village, I think. Zoro said it’s the not-city part of this place. [says this in a tone that heavily implies the idiot is utterly unhelpful] He also said something about a shitty house and a lake... Look, just tell me where to go and I’ll get there. If he comes looking it’ll just take fucking hours.

[nods] Yeah, it's really close to the lake. You'll know which one it is when you see it!

[sighs] I don't know where the lake is, Luffy. There's some kind of...pub up ahead, is it anywhere around there? And you still haven't told me what the hell this thing is, you know. [shakes the dreamberry a bit, like that'll help Luffy see what he's talking about]